Enough risks?

    Sometimes I find myself asking do I take enough risks, or am I too timid? I look around, and by first glance I think comparative wise maybe I don't. People I consider close are always doing things, exciting things, and I'm just like what am I doing? I know that I have to realize how far I have come, and how much I have done in the past. Because honestly that list in itself is quite long.
    However, I notice for example like last weekend when I got to hang out with some family we went to Sir Goonies (a small amusement park) it was fun, being around people and interacting with them. it was fun racing the go carts, even when I got ran into, and ended up facing the other way. It made me realize that I don't care to be by myself much. I can be by myself just fine because I got used to it at times, but now I wonder just how much did I miss out on.
    I'm very thankful for the people in my life who helped me slowly break down my walls, even if they don't know that they did just by inviting, and involving me in parts of their own lives. My illness has never held me back really unless I let it, and I think people can attest to the fact that I always tried, and gave my everything in the past. Well maybe it's time to take some more risks, have some more fun, live life. I'm not sure what I'm gonna do just yet, but I know that I just wanna do something.

Hearts of the matter

    We all have a heart, now I'm not referring to the body organ. I mean the place that our emotions emanates from. While some hearts are bright with light, others sadly are black as coal. Some people are more in tune with their hearts, while others tend to listen more to their mind. 

    Hearts bring us the ability to love others. Sometimes they bring us nothing, but hurt and grief. Some people see love, and as weak, because of all the heartache they can cause, and at how easy it is to manipulate at times. However, in my opinion love is strength. I try to live by my heart, and all the emotions that come with doing so. 

    Hearts can be broken, they can be iced over, and their light can be snuffed out all due to events that come to pass. Despite all of that with the help from another heart they can always be cured. So try to keep your hearts light shining bright. 

Quiet, but things are looking up

    You know lately things have been calm. Treatment has been going smoothly. I haven't been sick in awhile. Things have for the most part been quiet. I'm not sure if that's a completely good thing or not really. The whole calm before the storm saying comes to mind. Another reasons I say it's been quiet is just stating the truth. Seems like lately I'm noticing or feeling like I'm fading. the group I hang out with usually well I wonder if they even realize its been over a month since I actually got to go do something with them.
    Fo the ones who've moved away for school it's actually at times getting easier, we text, and I've started letter writing, (Not sure if ill get a reply though ha) and they do visit sometimes, but it's still not the easiest thing in the world, when you look around, and realize the majority of your time you've spent by yourself.
    Despite all of this I have to honestly say that things are looking up.  Sure at times it may not seem like it, but in the bigger picture I'm doing better than I have in awhile. There are a few kinks to work out, but I think everybody has some honestly. I'm trying to trust that everything is gonna work out the best way it can.

Opinion on opinions

    Opinions, we all have them, We also all have different views and beliefs on certain topics, and that's a good thing. We're all different so it makes sense that our opinions may differ from each other from time to time. While it's ok to have different opinions, it's still important to respect others opinions. You wouldn't want someone tearing you down because of how you see something. So you shouldn't tear someone else down vice versa.
    Sometimes arguments will arise due to conflicting opinions though however, in that case it's usually better to just agree to disagree. Never let anyone make feel like your opinion is wrong, remember that's just the way they see it. While it's good to take pride in your opinions, remember pride is a deadly sin, and it easily can get to where you're shoving your opinion down peoples throats (No one wants that).
    Just remember to be considerate when people finally open up, and share whats one their mind. You never know when something you say could be taken the wrong way.

R5 live in Atlanta (2nd year in a row)

    So most everyone who knows me, knows that for my 21st birthday I celebrated with a trip to Atlanta to see R5. For my 22nd birthday however, I actually bought myself tickets to see them as well, however the show was in september. Finally the day arrived and I go to to back and see them again, of course I had the VIP pass again. Tina, and I did have a few bumps along the way trying to get there, but it was an awesome day for me.
    When I got to go, and get my picture with them they actually seemed to remember me, and like last year after the picture was took I turned around and, hugged Rydel. (Gotta start tradition lol). The show, even with Ross a bit under the weather was still great, and they gave it their all. I'll be honest the seats I got were nosebleed section, but with the pictures I got you wouldn't believe it. I even ran into a few of the people I met at last years show, which was surprising see how this one had nearly quadrupled its audience.
    So a little belated birthday gift to me from me, and I couldn't have asked for anything better. Heres hoping for next year!

Letter Writing

    So here lately I've took up letter writing since I have a number of people who aren't quite as close by as they used to be. I know many people see it as a dying art form, but I enjoy it. I think people enjoy a hand written note waiting for them in the pile of mail. Texting, email, social media are all fine, but with a letter it takes time, and I think it means a little more because it's personal. There's no spellchecker, and if you're like me and use a pen you take time making sure no mistakes get written. 

    I know I personally love getting letters, not just for holidays, but just a random note every now and then. Hopefully I get some replies from the letters I'm sending out, but if not it's fun just sending them for me.