Do you ever wish you could go back in time, or maybe get the chance that you never had? Now I'm not saying changing the circumstances, but simply taking chances where you never did.
Where when you look back, and your like if you had maybe done this maybe things would have been different.
I know I wish I had been more open and inviting with people, but during high school I put up walls, and evaded people, and honestly I see that I missed out on a lot. My social skills suffered, I got so used to being alone. Now however I have people in my life who I care about, and I know they care about me, but when I'm alone I get that feeling of isolation. Part of it is the fact that I missed so much, and part is I don't want to lose these friends I have now.
I guess that I enjoy spending time with friends, but from all that I missed, I try to make up for. Resulting in feeling lonely when I'm alone. I think I honestly know they are sincerely friends, but I just don't want to go back to where I don't go out or have people over.
So yeah if I could make some changes I would. I would have been more outgoing. However, I would not change the fact of having MPS, because as I have said I've never blamed that for any if my problems "you have obstacles in your path simply go around them" a true statement that I apply to dealing with MPS
So I'm trying to be more outgoing now, but something holds me back at times. Will just have to see how things go.
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