Doubts

    Trust is honestly a hard thing for everyone, I've become pretty open with meeting new people lately however, holding on to those new relationships seem to wanna tear me apart inside. I honestly don't have the best self esteem at times, and self doubt. 

    I read things into things that aren't there at times, and sometimes question whether a friendship is true. I have made some good friends and I've got to the point of trusting them. I know my uncertainty and doubts at times probably get old and annoying to some people, causing the very problems I was worrying over. I worry I get annoying, I worry I become a burden.

    For a while I closed myself off from opening up to people, and now I kinda remember why. I can be needy, which can feed of my insecurities and doubts. When something goes wrong I blame myself. Some say it's the price to pay for having a big heart, the bigger the heart the easier it is to hurt. Personally I choose to see that as a positive way to look at it.

    So for me trust is honestly not the easiest, and I hope I don't ruin some of these new friendships im making, but I guess only time will tell.