dangers of alone

    You know being alone isn't a bad thing, it's also not what hurts people. In fact everyone needs alone time now and then to relax. In my opinion the damaging side of being alone, is when it comes after being used to not being alone, after trusting people and enjoying each other. To going from talking almost daily to going to no replies at the drop of the hat. Promises once made, now broken.
    The cycle of meeting people, learning about each other, trusting and caring for each other, then disappearing. That cycle plays out in everyones life at some point. However in some cases it happens again, again, and again. The cycle never seeming to break. This leads to doubts forming, trust issues, self esteem issues. For those cases I'm not really sure what can be done, because each time you try to reach out to someone new to make a new friend you take the risk. Really all any of us can do is be hopeful that this new encounter will prosper, and be thankful for the people we already have in our lives, even if we feel like we don't have that many. If you can say you have one person in your life that cares you are blessed.

obstacles? go around them.

    You know lately I've been pretty bored, honestly this past weekend I did nothing productive. It took an old show to remind me of a lesson. You see I was blaming the fact that the people I wanted to hang out with were busy, and I was using that as an excuse to not do anything all weekend. Which in the long run effected no one but myself.
    I was blaming my circumstances for my problems, when I could have done other thing instead. Honestly if you have obstacles blocking your path go around them. Don't just let them become an excuse to give up. So thanks to Sabrina the teenage witch for reminding me of that!

In their own time

    People say that everything happens for a reason, and if it's meant to be it will happen in its own time. I'm hopeful, and always wanna believe the best will come. However, I have the tendencie as I've mentioned before to expect the worst. I don't like the uncertainty, the waiting to see where things will end up. I pray that my uncertainties don't end up causing my fears to become the realities.

    Time never sits still, and things constantly are changing, but I don't think it's wrong to want some constant things in your life. Things you can depend on, and trust. So why do I lay awake worrying if things are about to shatter? When will peace of mind come? I don't know to be honest. But I'm holding on to the facts what I've been told, and I'm holding on to hope, because honestly I guess that's all you can do, just hope for the better. 

    

New trusts

    Lately I've opened up to new people, which I'm hoping is a good thing as I've been burned in that area before. It however, is not good to isolate yourself even if it just what you prefer to be by yourself, or at least thats what people have told me. Anyways, I'm still playing pokemon, and with it meeting several people. However, a few have actually managed to grow close. Will, someone who turns out actually grew up in same neighborhood as me, and seems to understand all the medical drama my life is filled with. Chris a positive person who's already taught me not to fret over the little things trying to hold me back. Lastly Tim who is just honestly a nice person and enjoys Cici's pizza with me ha.
    Three new people, actually make that three new friends that I just clicked with. None have held my limitations against me or treated me any differently despite them. It's a nice feeling trust. However, I've had some bumps along the way as I always expect things not to last, or to fade away as a result of something I did. These new friends though have each shown me the good side of trust, and assured me not to let the doubts in my mind underestimate the strength of the friendships.
    I'm not the best when it comes to trust, but for the moment I'm letting myself try.